[Note: The "professional government" in Oshkosh is enamored of "Tax Incremental Financing" (TIF) as a means of economic development. A recent story in the Oshkosh Northwestern indicated the existence of 18 TIF districts in Oshkosh, with the city administration concluding that they have been "successful." I got to thinking that a perfect theme song for the city of Oshkosh "professional government" would be an updated version of "If I Were a Rich Man" from Fiddler on the Roof. Giving tax breaks to the wealthy and justifying it to the population at large in the name of "progress" and "growth" is exactly the kind of Czarist sham the people of Anatevka (the small Russian village that Fiddler takes place in) confronted in the year 1905. The poor protagonist Tevye (Zero Mostel) could only dream of getting the special treatment reserved for the inside power brokers, a situation not substantially different from that existing in the majority of American municipalities today.] -Tony Palmeri
TIF I were a rich man Oshkosh city fathers would give me tax breaks daidle deedle daidle very dum All year long I'd get corporate welfare biddy biddy bum TIF I were a wealthy man I wouldn't have to work hard Oshkosh city fathers would have special closed meetings just for me daidle deedle daidle very dum TIF I were a biddy biddy rich Deedle daidle deedle daidle man TIF I were rich I'd have the time that I lack To sit in the City Manager's office from June to May And always have a seat in the City Hall And I'd never have to open my financial books For the "professional government" men Who'd suck up to me seven hours every day That could be the sweetest thing of all The most important men in City Hall Will come to fawn on me In closed Executive Session they will ask me to advise them Like a Boss Tweed the wise "If you please Reb Tevye, Pardon me Reb Tevye" Posing problems that would cross The City Manager's eyes And it won't make one bit of difference If I answer right or wrong When you're rich, The Oshkosh Common Council thinks you really know TIF I were a rich man Oshkosh city fathers would give me tax breaks daidle deedle daidle very dum All year long I'd get corporate welfare biddy biddy bum TIF I were a wealthy man I wouldn't have to work hard Oshkosh city fathers would have special closed meetings just for me daidle deedle daidle very dum TIF I were a biddy biddy rich Deedle daidle deedle daidle man TIF I were a rich man Daidle deedle daidle deedle daidle very dum City Fathers about the little guy do not give a damn You decreed I should be what I am Would I have more clout in your good old boy city plan If I were a wealthy man?