Volume
2, Issue 2, Summer 1998
THE
TWENTY EIGHT HOUR DAY
By
Mary
Koepp
Have
you been wondering lately why you’ve been so stressed?
Maybe it’s because there aren’t enough hours in a day!!! Feeling stressed myself awhile back, and thinking
I needed more time in a day to get everything done that I wanted to accomplish, I made a
log of what I ‘needed’ to do in one day. Here
goes:
Task
Hours Needed
Get
ready for work - hair, makeup
½
Personal
Hygiene (shower, etc.)
1
Cook/eat
or prepare two meals
2
Floss
teeth (3 times a day) (I have dental problems)
¼
Work
8+
Travel
to and from work
1
Time
for self
1 (if really lucky)
Time
with husband
1 (if lucky)
Bond
with children (I have two daughters)
2 (one hour each)
Attend
children/spouse/work activities
2
Exercise
(right???)
½
Walk
or play with the dog
½
Get
ready for bed
½
Sleep
7-8
Now if you have parents, nieces, nephews, volunteer commitments, or want to read the paper or keep up with current affairs (like watch TV) add those minutes and hours to your day…and build in some fun time to so-called relax…HOW MAY HOURS ARE YOU UP TO??…AND YOU WONDER WHY YOU’RE STRESSED!!!
A
WORD FROM THE EAP DIRECTOR
In the last issue, I invited you to
contribute to the EAP Update! Mary’s
contribution is an example. We benefit from
your contributions. We can know each other a
little more and learn some interesting things
from each other. I hope you will think about offering an article. Topics may vary and can be about things you have
learned, hobbies, specialties, interests, or about your research. Share a poem you like or wrote, or an experience.
If you have come across information that is relevant to us write a note about that. Send your submissions to the EAP Office: c/o 201
Dempsey Hall.
WHAT! See A Counselor? Why I don’t want to do that!
The
Stigma of Seeking Help
Part
I - Myths and Taboos
This
article represents the first of a two-part series to address the stigma of seeking the
help of a counselor or psychologist. In the
second part, which will be printed in the fall, I will address key concerns that come up
about Employee Assistance Program Consultations.
If asked what the most commonly experienced emotional concern among employees is,
would you likely name depression and stress? Depression
and anxiety are leading mental health issues that affect employees here and elsewhere. However, I would add that the most prevalent
problem is being shy about seeking needed help or advice.
These individuals never make it to the door.
The
stigma of seeking help is not a new problem. We all suffer from it at one time or another and
in one way or another. We are embarrassed by
our need. We
may feel we want or need assistance and even so, something drives us to attempt to
figure things out on our own. People have all
kinds of fears, thoughts and expectations that contribute to their overall hesitance to
see a counselor or psychologist. A myriad of
thoughts, like “I will feel stupid,” and fears, like “my supervisor or
colleagues may hear that I went to EAP,” affect people’s inclination to seek out
help. There are also many myths about
mental health and illness. All of these
thoughts and fears, collectively form the “stigma,” and lead to
individuals’ biases. The media impacts
our reactions as well by sensationalizing horror stories.
Once a person is skeptical about getting help they may have a tendency to notice
stories that confirm that skepticism. Information
presenting an alternate perspective may not be recognized or if received, may be
discredited. In this way, gradually, and
without much conscious thought, people’s biases, whether or not they are founded,
become stable, fixed and unchanging.
When
people look for a counselor or psychologist they are generally looking for:
· to be respected, recognized for their knowledge and
receive personal validation
· renewed
hope
· to
feel better about themselves
· to
have or regain choice
· to
improve mood
· to
know the terms of the counseling relationship and meeting
· privacy
and assurance of confidentiality
· to
be listened to and taken seriously
· to
be respected as the primary agent in problem resolution
· to
make a plan to rectify the situation
Our
biases speak a very different language. Typical
fears include:
· my
problems are worse than other people’s problems
· “shrinks”
are eccentric and mentally unstable themselves
· getting
help is a sign of inadequacy
· I
should handle problems on my own
· what
good will it do? there is nothing anyone can do any how
· others
will see me and it will reflect badly on me at work
· people
will think I am crazy
· people
will think I am stupid
These
lists are not exhaustive. Employees who have
family members struggling with alcoholism, depression, schizophrenia, or a child with
attention deficit disorder may believe that they are to
“blame “ for the problem and refrain from getting the support they need.
It is also the case that when we hurt the most, we are most self-conscious about how our
life appears to other people. The fear of
failing leads us to think that if our life is not “ideal” then others will think
less of us. The consequence of this kind of thinking is to present a solid facade and/or a
tendency to withdraw from others so they will not know how we really are. This protective
measure can lead to more serious problems. Because
of the stigma of going to see a psychologist,
counselor or of seeking advice in EAP, routine problems are often left to fester until
they become more severe and necessitate a degree of intervention that would otherwise have
been unnecessary.
Some things you can do to increase your confidence to seek out a counselor or
psychologist.
· Select
a psychologist or counselor who is professionally certified and licensed by the state. The staff of UW Oshkosh Employee Assistance
Program hold professional credentials to
provide mental health services.
· Word
of mouth is valuable. Go to someone who was
personally recommended to you by a friend as trustworthy
· Be
up front in your first meeting that this is a good faith effort
· Ask
questions. No question is too silly and no
question is unimportant
· Do
not hesitate to talk with the counselor about how they understand your situation, problems
and what your options and resources are.
· Find
out what to expect regarding frequency, time and length of meeting and anticipated number
of sessions.
· If
your concerns are not fully satisfied, tell the counselor or psychologist how.
· If
you are unsatisfied with the person you meet, ask to see someone else.
· Read
any initial paperwork you are offered about your rights and be aware of what you are
signing.
· Take
a minute to honestly complete any follow-up anonymous satisfaction survey that the
provider makes available to you
There are personal reasons why each of us, in our own way, is uncertain about asking for assistance. In addition, Employee Assistance Programs are
susceptible to being stigmatized because they exist both in and for the workplace
community and employees are concerned about the effect that a visit may have on their job.
They worry about privacy, confidentiality and record keeping. These are valid concerns and will be addressed in
the Fall issue of “EAP Update.”
NOTICE
NOW
ACCEPTING QUESTIONS FOR SEPTEMER’S BROWN BAG LUNCH MEETING
“EVERYTING
YOU ALWAYS WANTED TO KNOW, BUT WERE AFRAID TO ASK!”
How
often have you had a question about your health, sleep, exercise, illness, nutrition,
diet, medication, mood, stress, schizophrenic aunt, alcohol consumption or about a sexual
concern? You may have stifled the question
because you were afraid to ask, didn’t know where
to look it up. Then you decided that maybe the question “wasn’t so important
anyway.” EAP offers you the
opportunity to ask that question and to do so without identifying who you are. No question is too embarrassing or too mundane if
you are genuinely wanting a reply. Ask general
questions on any aspect of medical and/or mental health illness or treatment no matter how
involved or how basic the topic. You may opt
to attend the brown bag lunch meeting and ask your question in person, but if you are
squeamish, let us introduce your question for you. Submit your questions in advance to
give the group time to research an accurate response.
In doing so, please know that questions that require a medication assessment and/or
personal history need to be addressed by your
family physician or appropriate professional provider.
EAP
will accept anonymous questions by mail. As
many questions as time will allow will be drawn from a hat and answered in a public forum
on Wednesday, September 16th, at Noon.
Send your question to the attention of:
EMPLOYEE
ASSISTANCE PROGRAM
c/o
Everything You Always Wanted to Know but Were Afraid To Ask.
201
Dempsey Hall.
Respondents
will be Gail McNutt, M.D, and Diane Zanto, APNP from
the University Health Service and Joan Killinger, M.S.E.,
from the University Employee Assistance Program/Counseling Center. Dr. McNutt
is board certified in Internal Medicine, Allergy and Immunology and joined the
Health Service staff in 1997. Diane Zanto is
a Family Nurse Practitioner with prescriptive authority and 23 years of experience. She is
Director of the Student Health Service. Joan
Killinger has her masters in counseling and worked as a nurse for a number of years,
primarily in family education. She has been a
staff member of the EAP/University Counseling Center since 1991.
UPCOMING
ACTIVITIES
SEPTEMBER
Everything
You Always Wanted to Know But Were Afraid to Ask.
September
16, 1998
Noon
Reeve: 222
A
forum to answer questions on medical and mental health, illness and treatment. Submit questions in advance of the meeting by writing anonymously to
“Employee Assistance Program - c/o Everything You Always Wanted to Know But Were
Afraid to Ask. 201 Dempsey Hall
Gail
McNutt, MD
Diane
Zanto, APNP
Joan
Killnger, M.S.E.
OCTOBER
Conflict
Resolution Series
Jayne Lokken, Ph.D.
EAP will host Brown Bag Lunches to
discuss conflicts in the workplace from two perspectives, that of supervisors and
supervisees. The series will be offered
October 8th and October 22nd.
We tend to associate negative
feelings with conflict and see it as a destructive force.
The premise of these discussions is that conflict can be useful, productive and can
enhance relationships. The specific reasons people do not address conflict vary and at
times these reasons may be tied to issues of power. Additionally,
it may be difficult to raise issues publicly because a person could feel committed to a
course of action that he/she had not anticipated or explored. Participants may submit
questions prior to the Conflict Resolution Series discussion to maintain anonymity. Send questions to: Jayne Lokken, Employee
Assistance Program, 201 Dempsey Hall.
October
8th, 1998
12:00 – 1:00/1:30
Reeve Union: 220
Co-worker Conflict.
A forum for employees who experience conflict with co-worker/s or supervisor/s.
October 22nd, 1998
12:00 – 1:30
Reeve Union: 220
Supervisory Conflict.
A forum for supervisors who are responsible to address conflict between
supervisees.
Your
Financial Portrait: A Discussion on Diversification and the Art of Investing
Back
by popular demand.
November
18th, 1998
Noon
Reeve: 220AB
Successful
investing blends a number of different investments in order to create a portfolio that is
consistent with the investor’s goals and objectives.
When making investment decisions, there are a variety of factors that can dictate
your particular course of action. These
factors include your own needs, you views on taking risk, and your current financial
situation. Attend this program to explore
your investment personality.
IF
you are interested in joining the weekly noon hour Weight Watchers Program, call Paula
Hayford at 424-2424.
TIP:
Exercise In Front of The TV
Illustration
Other
than the counselors of EAP and myself, there are a number of employees active “behind
the scenes of EAP.” It is time they were
recognized. An Advisory Board consults to the
EAP Program. The Advisory Board is a standing
committee and meets monthly during the academic year.
Church,
Frank
News Bureau
Dettlaff,
Dawn (Chair) Residence Life
Hansen,
Bunny
Continuing Education
Hartman,
Diana
Vice Chanc. Office
Horner,
David
Psychology Dept.
Koepp,
Mary
Personnel
McDougal,
Kevin
Mathematics
Merz,
Don
Counseling Center
Reiter,
Karen
LLR-Polk
Two
committees work hard to make you aware of EAP and to assure that services are confidential
and well organized. The committees are the
Public Relations Committee
and
the Quality Assurance Committee. Join me in
recognizing and thanking these people:
PUBLIC
RELATIONS
Sally
Fox, Chair
History
Norris
Batts
Admissions
Paula
Gonyo
College of Nursing
Pam
Goode
Advisement/Registration
Mike
James
Blackhawk Commons
Mitch
Kilcrease
Reeve Union
Connie
Schuster
Reeve Union
Rosalie
Slomski
Student Health Center
Tom
Witte
Residence Life
Penny
Wood
Document Services
Ray
Perry, Chair
COEHS
Julie
Allen
Reeve Union
Diane
Bunck
Personnel
Frank
Church
News Bureau
Jeanne
Foley
LLR
Don
Merz
Counseling Center
Marc
Nylen
Residence Life
George
Philip
College of Business